Monday 26 March 2012

Can't Start, Won't Start!

Bastard!!
Yes, it's that time of year again, when the savanna needs cutting...

Mr. Rat decided to make a nest under my mower and was not a happy ratty when I moved it. Bloody little sod (rather big actually) used to make foraging expeditions into the greenhouse to chew up bits of string and stuff to make his house! A trail of debris led right back to the mower.

Anyway, here's a step by step guide on how to resurrect your petrol mower after a long cold winter. Click to zoom in as per...


Note to self: Never push a mower around for hours in long grass after f**king your back up trying to pull start a knackered petrol mower all morning. Unless you're ok with hobbling around in your pants the next day 'cause you can't get your jeans on!

28 comments:

Tom Stephenson said...

You, me and Cro have all done petrol related posts this morning. It must be spring.

John Going Gently said...

that is the cleanest mower I have EVER SEEN!!!!!!!!!!!
btw
whats up with that shirt collar?

Chris said...

Tom - I'll have a look then. Just finished a bee post which was not about petrol.

John - very clean apart from the incumbent rat!

It used to be stiff, then went all floppy. How like life...

Amanda said...

I would love to be able to use a green mower, but I have way too much land to ever get it mowed that way. (NOT complaining about too much land - love it!)

I do have 3 kids...maybe I could get them to mow it? Set up a competition or something to see who can get the most done? They do like competing against each other!

Chris said...

Amanda - never mind competitions, tell 'em they won't eat until it's done! There's a time for the carrot and a time for the stick - it's stick time when you need the grass mowing lol.

Think of the petrol you'll save!

Lisa @ Two Bears Farm said...

Your 'green' mower looks nicer than ours. It does give the back a workout though - I use ours just around the house and the kids' playset. It's a workout! Ours is all rusted and about 70 years old, lol. We have other mowers but I don't mess with them.

Hippo said...

Just get yer back into it and stop whining. I am just clearing two hectares of scrub and I don't see the local women I employed to do it by hand complaining...

Chris said...

Lisa - really? It's been sat in the shed and rarely comes out to play but it cuts really fine. I'm hoping to open a putting green later in the year. Next time you see me pushing this I'll have my lycra shorts on. I'll post pics of that next halloween.

Tom - slavery is now illegal. Hasn't that info filtered down there yet? Bloody colonialists! ;-)

Texan said...

Gas lawn mowers will test the patience of a saint I tell you!

Chris said...

Tex - I agree. As you can see I have lost my halo over this thing.

I'm now going for a haircut at Amanda's...

trish said...

Hope your back is better soon....I am always shocked how big rats are when I see one ( which isn't that often, thank goodness ).

Elaine said...

You have a wonderful ability to extract the maximum mirth out of things. You made me laugh - but then left me with that awful image of you being unable to get your jeans on..

Hippo said...

"Bloody colonialists! ;-)"

It really is tiresome when I have to correct spelling.

It is 'Convenientalists'

fromsophiesview said...

Sahweet...now I can pretend to fix the mower..oh gees can't even do that...we don't have one...hahahh!

Jim said...

Chris, you are the IDEAL neighbour to have!! We just lost ours, a guy who could build anything out of nothing type, he and wifey moving to town! Selling their house...3 bedroom split-level.....interested? Please!
Another very creative post Chris! The push mower is much better for you and the environment....as you know.

Cro Magnon said...

My medium sized, Honda engined, mower has always been an enigma. After having owned her for about 10 years, I've recently discovered that she just likes to be treated gently. Even after her Winter holiday, a light pull on her cord and away she went.

Chris said...

Trish - Yes they always look bigger through a rifle scope too! I am a terrible shot though. Looks like it's gone as the vole has moved back. :-)

Elaine - not on purpose - my life is just a joke that I force feed you lot!

You say awful - methinks you protest too much...haha ;-)

Gobber - is that even a word?

Chris said...

Sophie - who needs a lawn anyway when you have the whole beach to charge up and down!

Jim - frankly yes! Although I wonder if I'll have any time to mow any grass, what with the neighbours demanding bespoke furniture etc., ;-D

Cro - this is the mower we're talking about here and not the Lady?

This one looks like a honda but is actually an Italian rip off. Same design though.

And to think I used to take old Vespa's apart (putting them back together again was always an issue though).

Jim said...

Back again Chris! This time to let you know of a GIVEAWAY I am having on todays post! It involves writing and I thought of you and a few others who might be good at this! So when you have a break of a few minutes give it a look! Thanks.

Moving with Mitchell said...

I also wondered about that shirt collar. It isn't just floppy; it's... erratic.

I was so impressed that you could take apart and service a power mower. Next step, making one work!

Chris said...

Jim - Giveaway eh? I can't write worth sh*t but I'll have a bash. Anything for a freebie!

Mitch - just you wait. I'll have set an international fashion trend by this time next week. All the kids will be wearing collars like that, you'll see!

sarah toa said...

WTF was wrong with your mower in the end? It looks so new and shiny ...

Chris said...

Sarah - Gremlins. I've given my best man Colin the task of killing them and resurrecting the damn thing as I need it!

I love the push mower but life's too short to mow all day everyday. It's like working on a bloody golf course!

Rebecca said...

I don't think our mower was that clean the day we bought it... I saw a push mower that someone had attached to a bike, here's the link. They call it a "mowercycle," ha! http://inhabitat.com/mowercycle-human-powered-lawnmower/

Melodie said...

You can't get a greener mower than goats,lol and they fertilize as they go! There is no end to where varmints will make a nest,rats ,possums,coons,wild cats.We once had a feral cat have kittens under a tarp that blew off the boat.Talk about a surprise when we went to put it back on the boat!(they were about 3 weeks old,we were in no hurry to recover the boat!)
I have awarded you,come by and pick it up!

Chris said...

Melodie - I knew you'd say that! And you're right, they would be great at keeping the grass down - and the trees, flowers, shrubs, fruit bushes...LOL. I need to find some decent space for 'em then it's a goat-a-go-go!

Oooo I'm on my way over, thank you!

DebH said...

I was embarrassed to even read this post..I saw the photos of a clean sparkly mower and kept thinking of mine. Very embarrassed now. If I showed you where it sits for the winter, you'ld be horrified. Bad...real bad...
I'll be looking for a handy roto-cutter like yours soon. I don't go very far in taking anything apart. It'ld never be the same.

Lady Mondegreen's Secret Garden said...

Tee hee. Just caught up with this post. I hope your back's better by now. If we didn't live so far apart you could borrow my ride-on...